My Dad Gave Everything to My Greedy Stepmom and Her Kids, So I Left to Live With My Rich Aunt

I asked him why and he said my words hurt him a little. I immediately dropped my smile, apologized, and reassured him that it wasn’t my intention to hurt him and that I thought I was laughing with him, not at him.

I apologized again and haven’t commented on that topic since, obviously, because I love him and care about his well-being. If they continued despite OP saying it’s hurtful, they’re idiots.

I disagree. You are the idiot.

Technically, it is your second marriage. You were legally married; you lived with the person you were married to.

It did count in a court of law. You’re going to have a second wife.

Pretending it didn’t doesn’t change that fact. You got married for the wrong reasons, kind of making a mockery out of the system.

Some people would heavily disapprove of that choice, especially when some people who actually love one another cannot get married for a variety of reasons.

Update: I have to answer some common questions. Why I married my close friend?

Health insurance mostly, but also because they kept holding her tuition over her head. We were both in grad school at the time.

She was gunning for a PhD and I was going for a masters, but I had a job in an energy commission with some benefits. They’d always tell her that they’d stop sending her money or some months, when the arguing was bad, not send her money at all.

They used money to punish her, basically. She had a lot of health issues at the time that she could get help with, like chronic pain and wisdom teeth that really needed to be removed, alongside some other personal issues.

So getting married got them off her back about her identity, got her on my health insurance plan, and got them to be more consistent on sending tuition money for her. There are a few other things too, like how they kept setting up potential arranged marriages for her or threatening to take her home to their country.

There was also a time when they threatened to commit her to a mental health facility. I don’t know; it was complicated, but it was something that worked for us.

I was able to pay for her treatment and let her use my money for herself. She has now graduated and is financially stable.

To my knowledge, she no longer speaks with most of her family. She’s doing fantastic for herself, and I’m so damn proud of her.

My fiancée knows about my past marriage and has no issue with it. I met her through my close friend, actually, as a mutual of a mutual at the time.

I was already split from my close friend, and while she was initially confused, my close friend and I sat her down and explained things as clearly as possible. She understands why we did what we did.

I was always 100 percent transparent with my family about my marriage to my close friend. My family understood that I went through a rough relationship before my marriage.

“I won’t force you to do anything, but I’m really disappointed that you take marriage so lightly,” were my mom’s exact words then.

They understood that I married my close friend to help her, but I also got the slight impression that they figured everything would sort itself out with our marriage, i.e., I would fall in love with her or something. When I met my fiancée, I told them how it was a big deal to me that it was my first genuine supportive romantic relationship in a long time.

They all seemed happy for me at the time, and no comments like these came up. They told me they were glad I was able to find love again.

It was only when we announced the engagement that these comments started.

Well, that is insanely sweet of you. You really went above and beyond for her.

You are a saint, and you were there for your friend when she needed the help most. I’m sorry all the conservatives came out of the woodwork to “well, technically” you, but you did the right thing.

“It’s just a joke” is a BS cop-out. They know it; they just want to be crazy to you and expect you and your fiancée to deal with it.

After you cool down, I’d pick a family member you really want to preserve the relationship with and talk to them one-on-one. Give them a chance to pull their head out of their butts, but make it clear that this is a hill you will die on.

You are not going to subject your fiancée to them. Best of luck.