My Failed Comedian Mother Mocked My Suicide Attempt At My Engagement Party. I Decided To “Roast” Her In Front Of Her Entire Circle. Did I Go Too Far?

Chapter 13: Boundaries and Security

The wedding planner called me 3 days later while I was at work and I could hear panic in her voice before she even explained why she was calling. She said Gina had contacted her directly asking about microphone access during the reception, wanting to know the technical setup and when would be the best time to use it.

I felt rage flood through my body so fast it made my hands shake because Gina had literally promised me 2 days ago that she wouldn’t give a speech. I left work early and drove straight to Gina’s apartment, not even calling first because I knew if I gave her warning she’d prepare some excuse.

She opened the door in sweatpants with her hair a mess and I pushed past her into the living room. When I confronted her about calling the wedding planner, she put her hands up and said she just wanted to sing a song for us. That it wasn’t a speech, it was a musical tribute.

I told her I knew she was lying and that she was planning some kind of performance that would make everything about her again. I stood in her messy living room with comedy notebooks scattered everywhere and told her that if she did anything at the wedding that drew attention to herself I would never speak to her again.

She started crying and saying I was being cruel, that she just wanted to celebrate her only daughter’s wedding and I was treating her like a criminal. I didn’t move or soften my voice, just stood there and told her that her celebrating had always meant humiliating me and I wouldn’t allow it this time.

She sank down onto her couch and buried her face in her hands. And for a second I almost felt bad before remembering the engagement party and how she’d acted out my suicide attempt for laughs. I left without saying goodbye and drove to Luke’s apartment to tell him what happened.

Luke listened to everything and then suggested we hire security for the wedding specifically to manage Gina. And even though it sounded ridiculous, I knew it was necessary. His parents called him while I was there. And when he explained the situation, they offered to pay for security because they didn’t trust Gina either after everything that had happened.

I agreed because I realized I needed to protect my wedding day even if it meant treating my own mother like a threat to my happiness. We spent the rest of the evening looking at security companies and explaining the situation. And I felt both relieved and deeply sad that this was what my life had come to.

Chapter 14: One Last Scheme

3 days before the wedding, I got a message on social media from Ted, one of Gina’s comedy friends who’d been at the fake bachelorette party. He said he wanted to talk to me about something important and could we meet for coffee. I almost ignored it but something in the message made me curious.

So I agreed to meet him at a place near my apartment. He showed up looking uncomfortable and guilty, stirring his coffee for a full minute before finally telling me that Gina had been calling all her comedy friends trying to get them to come to the wedding and support her.

He said it seemed like she was planning something and he thought I should know. That he felt bad for not speaking up about her behavior before. I thanked him and left the coffee shop feeling my stomach drop because I knew Gina was going to try something no matter how many boundaries I set.

I drove straight to Gina’s apartment again and didn’t even wait for her to invite me in before I started confronting her about inviting her comedy friends to my wedding. She broke down completely this time. Not the fake crying she usually did but real ugly sobbing that made her whole body shake.

She admitted she couldn’t handle being alone at an event where everyone judged her. That she knew she’d ruined our relationship but she was still my mother and she was terrified of being completely cut off from my life. I stood there watching her fall apart and felt uncomfortable because it was easier to hate her when she was just being awful. But this vulnerability made everything more complicated.

She said she didn’t know how to be at my wedding without her friends there as a buffer. That she was scared of facing Luke’s family alone after everything she’d done.

Chapter 15: The Letter

Luke and I had an emergency session with our therapist the next day. And I admitted I was scared of becoming like Gina, someone who hurts people and then justifies it. The therapist helped me see that recognizing this fear meant I was different from Gina because Gina never questioned whether her actions were wrong or thought about how they affected other people.

Luke reached over and took my hand, told me he loved me and trusted me. But he needed to know I wouldn’t use his vulnerabilities against him the way Gina had used mine. I promised him I wouldn’t and meant it. But I also knew I’d already crossed a line by exposing Gina’s secrets at the fake bachelorette party and I had to figure out how to be better than that.

We left the session with a plan for the wedding and boundaries for Gina. But I still felt uneasy about everything that could go wrong. I spent the night before the wedding sitting at my kitchen table with a blank piece of paper in front of me. Luke was at his parents’ house for some pre-wedding tradition his family did. So I had the apartment to myself.

I picked up the pen and put it down three times before I finally started writing. The letter came out messy and honest in a way I couldn’t manage face to face with Gina. I told her she could come to the wedding and bring one person from her comedy friends, someone who would help keep her grounded instead of encouraging her to perform.

I wrote that our relationship was broken and I didn’t know if it could be fixed, but I was willing to try if she could respect real boundaries this time. I explained that I needed space to build my marriage without constantly worrying about being turned into material for her next set.

The last paragraph was the hardest because I had to admit that some part of me still wanted a mother, even if Gina could never be the kind I needed. I sealed the envelope and left it on the counter planning to drop it at her apartment in the morning. I barely slept that night, kept seeing her face at the fake bachelorette party when I exposed all her secrets.