My High School Crush Kissed Me On A Bet To Humiliate Me. Now He Transferred To My College And Wants A Second Chance. Should I Give Him The Satisfaction Of A Response?

Nico’s Awakening

I walked into the library three days later to grab a book I’d reserved and there was Nico at one of the study tables near the windows. He looked up when I passed and something about his expression was different from all the other times I’d seen him lately. He stood up and came over, hands in his pockets, no confident swagger or calculated charm.

He asked how I’d been and his voice sounded normal, like he was actually asking instead of trying to start something. I said I’d been good, busy with classes and everything. He nodded and said he’d been thinking about what I said at the party about how I wasn’t interested in bringing someone into my life who reminded me of the worst moment of my old life.

He paused and looked at me directly and I could see he was trying to find the right words. He said he never really understood before how much that night affected me and he was sorry for minimizing it. When he tried to apologize, I stood there holding my book, surprised by how genuine he sounded. This wasn’t the Nico who made excuses or blamed being drunk or called it a weird moment. This was someone actually taking responsibility.

I told him I appreciated him saying that and I meant it. He shifted his weight and said there was more he wanted to tell me if I had a minute. I glanced at my phone, saw I had time before my next class, and said:

“Okay.”

We sat down at his table and he started talking about how he’d been seeing a therapist since last semester when his academic probation got serious. He said they’d been working on his pattern of not appreciating people until they were gone and he was starting to see how he did that with his ex-girlfriend at his old school and now with me. He explained that his ex had tried to talk to him about their relationship problems for months but he’d brushed her off because he thought she’d always be there. Then she broke up with him right before he flunked out and he lost everything at once. He said his therapist helped him realize he does the same thing with friendships and family, always assuming people will stick around no matter how he treats them.

I watched him talk, noticing how different he seemed from the guy who’d approached me at that first party. This version of Nico was uncomfortable and honest, not performing or trying to charm me. I told him I appreciated him being vulnerable and actually taking responsibility instead of making excuses. He looked relieved that I wasn’t shutting him down completely.

He asked if we could at least be friends, maybe grab coffee sometimes or just be normal when we saw each other around campus. I thought about it for a moment trying to figure out what I actually wanted. I told him maybe eventually, but I needed more space right now. He nodded and said he understood and he wouldn’t push or keep showing up everywhere I went. We stood up and he thanked me for listening, then went back to his studying while I checked out my book and left.

The Freedom of Indifference

The next few weeks passed with barely any contact between Nico and me. He kept his word about giving me space. I didn’t see him at my usual coffee shop or study spots, didn’t get random texts about homework or campus events. It felt strange at first like something was missing from my routine. But then I realized I’d gotten used to his constant presence without noticing, without that underlying tension of avoiding him or managing his attempts to get close. I felt lighter somehow.

Rocco and I were getting more serious, going on actual dates instead of just casual hangouts, talking about our plans for after graduation, making plans for spring break together. I was genuinely happy without any of the anxiety or second-guessing I’d felt in high school when I’d liked Nico.

Leilani noticed the change when we were getting ready to go out one Friday night. She said I seemed lighter lately, like I’d finally let go of something I didn’t realize I was still carrying. I asked what she meant and she explained that for months I’d been carrying this awareness of Nico, this need to maintain my distance and protect myself. Now I just seemed free of it, like it wasn’t taking up space in my head anymore. I realized she was right. I’d stopped thinking about Nico constantly, stopped planning how to avoid him or what I’d say if he approached me. He’d become background noise instead of the main event.

Fay grabbed me after our shared psychology class the following week and pulled me aside in the hallway. She said she’d heard through mutual friends that Nico had been keeping to himself more, focusing on his grades after almost losing his spot at this school too. Apparently his adviser had given him a serious warning about his GPA and he’d actually started showing up to all his classes and doing the work. She said he seemed different when she’d run into him at the student center: less cocky and more genuine, more willing to admit when he didn’t understand something instead of pretending he knew everything.

She wondered out loud if losing his chance with me actually taught him something real. I told her I hoped so for his sake, but it wasn’t really my concern anymore. She looked at me with this knowing smile and said:

“That was exactly the right answer. When someone becomes not your concern anymore, that’s when you know you’ve really moved on.”

I thought about that as I walked to my next class, realizing she was absolutely right. I didn’t need Nico to suffer or fail. I didn’t need him to pine after me forever. I just needed him to be irrelevant to my life. And he finally was.

Growth on All Sides

The club meeting that Thursday was focused on our semester projects and Nico was scheduled to present his research on community development initiatives. I’ll admit I was curious to see what he’d put together, remembering how he’d joined this club just to be around me and hadn’t seemed interested in the actual work.

He stood up at the front of the room with his laptop connected to the projector and I prepared myself for something half-done or poorly researched. Instead, he delivered a really thoughtful presentation about affordable housing programs in college towns with actual data and case studies and practical suggestions for our campus community. He’d clearly spent serious time on this project and his passion for the topic seemed genuine. When he finished, several people asked questions and he answered them confidently without being arrogant about it.

After the meeting ended I walked over to where he was packing up his materials. I told him his presentation was really good, that I was impressed by how much work he’d put into it. He looked up and smiled and it was different from any smile I’d seen on his face before. It seemed genuinely happy for the compliment rather than seeing it as an opening to push for more. He thanked me and said the project had actually made him think about what he wanted to do after graduation, maybe something in urban planning or community development. We chatted briefly about the research he’d done and the organizations he’d contacted. It felt almost normal. Like we could maybe be casual acquaintances someday who could have a conversation without all the weight of our history crushing every interaction.

Johnny found me in the campus dining hall the next week while I was grabbing lunch between classes. He sat down across from me with his tray and asked if I’d noticed that Nico seemed different lately. I said I’d noticed he was keeping to himself more and seemed more focused on the school. Johnny nodded and said Nico had been a better friend lately too. More reliable and less self-centered, actually showing up when he said he would instead of flaking for something better.

He said Nico had apologized to him for being a bad friend freshman and sophomore year, for only calling when he needed something or wanted to party. Johnny told me he thought getting rejected by me was a wakeup call. That Nico needed someone finally holding him accountable for his behavior instead of just going along with whatever he wanted.

I appreciated Johnny saying that, but I told him I was glad Nico was growing and becoming a better person, but his growth journey wasn’t my responsibility or my concern. Johnny agreed immediately and said he wasn’t trying to suggest I should give Nico another chance or anything like that. He just wanted me to know that my decision to protect myself and maintain your boundaries had actually helped more people than just me. Their whole friend group had started being more honest with each other and calling out bad behavior instead of laughing it off.