My Husband Cheated 3 Weeks Postpartum Because Witnessing Birth “Traumatized” Him. He Sells Surgical Equipment For A Living. How Should I Handle His Big Presentation Tomorrow

The Spiral

I spend the next two days watching Blake fall apart. He checks his phone every 10 minutes, refreshing his email over and over. He calls colleagues and asks if they’ve heard anything about the promotion decision. His voice gets tighter each time someone says they don’t know yet.

He paces around the house with his laptop open, replaying the presentation video. I can hear him muttering to himself about that woman’s questions. He keeps asking out loud why she targeted him specifically, what she wanted from him. I feed the baby and change diapers and pretend I don’t know anything. Blake barely notices I’m in the room. He’s too busy trying to figure out what went wrong.

He watches the Q&A section five times on Wednesday alone. Each time he gets to Jenny’s question, he pauses the video and stares at the screen. He’s looking for clues, trying to understand why she pushed so hard about his personal experience.

Thursday night the doorbell rings around 7:00. Blake answers it and Megan walks in carrying takeout bags. She’s never been to our house before. Blake always went to her apartment because he said it was easier that way. But tonight she’s here, rubbing his shoulders and unpacking Chinese food on our kitchen counter.

She tells him the presentation was perfect and that woman was probably just some angry feminist looking to cause trouble. Blake nods and leans into her touch. I stay in the nursery with the baby, sitting in the rocking chair with the door cracked open. Their voices carry down the hall.

Megan says Jenny probably has issues with men and wanted to make Blake look bad in front of his boss. Blake agrees and adds that some women can’t handle seeing successful men in medical sales. They spend 20 minutes trashing Jenny, calling her bitter and jealous.

I rock my daughter and listen to every word. Blake sounds more confident now that Megan’s here supporting him. He says he’s probably overthinking the whole thing. The promotion is basically his. Ramon doesn’t have his technical knowledge or presentation skills. Megan kisses his cheek and tells him he’s right. She leaves around 9:00 and Blake goes to bed looking more relaxed than he has in days.

Friday afternoon comes. Blake is in the living room when his phone rings. I’m in the kitchen heating up a bottle, but I can see him through the doorway. He answers on the first ring. His voice is eager and professional. Then his face changes. The color drains out of it completely. His shoulders slump forward. He doesn’t say much, just makes small sounds of acknowledgement. When he hangs up, he sits there staring at nothing for a full minute.

I walk into the room with the baby. Blake looks up at me like he forgot I existed. He says he didn’t get the promotion. Ramon got it instead. His voice is flat and hollow.

I ask what happened, keeping my tone concerned and supportive. Blake repeats what his boss told him. The technical knowledge was excellent. The presentation content was perfect. But the company needs someone who can handle unexpected challenges with poise. His Q&A performance showed a concerning weakness under pressure. Those exact words keep coming out of Blake’s mouth: “concerning weakness under pressure.”

He says Ramon stepped in during the networking session and answered follow-up questions smoothly. He was charming and confident and everything Blake wasn’t in that moment. Blake made himself look bad by comparison. He stands up and starts pacing again, but this time it’s different. He’s not anxious anymore. He’s angry.

He says Jenny sabotaged him somehow. She must have. That question wasn’t random. She knew exactly what to ask to make him freeze up, but he can’t figure out how she knew or why she did it. He never connects it to me. Why would he? His wife’s postpartum body problems have nothing to do with some executive’s wife asking questions at a presentation.

The Confrontation

I let him rage for an hour. He calls Jenny names. He says she probably has it out for all men in the company. He wonders if she’s trying to push some feminist agenda by making male presenters look bad. He texts Megan and she calls back immediately. I can hear her voice through the phone—high and sympathetic. She tells him this is discrimination and he should report Jenny to someone. Blake agrees and says he’s going to figure out what her problem is.

When he finally runs out of steam, I ask quietly if we can talk about our marriage. Blake barely glances at me.

“Now isn’t the time,” he says. “I need support, not more problems to deal with.”

I tell him I’ve been thinking about his comments about my body and the birth. I’d like to understand his perspective better. Blake waves his hand dismissively.

“We’ve been over this already,” he says. “My honesty should be appreciated, not analyzed to death. You should be grateful I’m being transparent instead of lying. Most men would have just left by now. I’m still here, still trying to make this work despite everything.”

I nod slowly. Then I tell him I contacted Jenny two weeks ago. Blake’s head snaps up. Finally, he’s paying attention to me.

I explain that I told her everything he said about being disgusted by my body after watching the birth. I told her about the affair with Megan. I told her about his supposed biological repulsion to me. Blake’s face goes completely white. His mouth opens but nothing comes out. I keep talking in the same calm voice.

Jenny didn’t ambush him randomly. I set it up. I researched his boss’s family after learning about the cesarean presentation. I knew Jenny had her own traumatic birth experience. I called her and told her the truth about what her company’s rising star really thinks about childbirth.

Blake’s color comes back all at once, flooding his face red. He starts screaming.

“You destroyed my career over your insecurity about your postpartum body!” he yells. “You’re vindictive and crazy! You ruined everything because you couldn’t handle my honesty!”

I stay calm and point out that I simply told the truth to someone who asked a reasonable question about his stated beliefs. He gave that whole speech about respecting the birth process and the female body. Jenny just wanted to know if he had personal experience to back up those beautiful words.

Blake lunges toward me. His hands are reaching out and his face is twisted with rage. Then our daughter starts crying from her bassinet across the room. The sound cuts through everything. Blake stops mid-motion, his hands still extended toward me. He looks at the screaming baby, then at his own hands, then at me.

Something shifts in his eyes. He sees what he looks like right now: almost getting physical with his wife while their infant daughter screams in the background. His hands drop to his sides. He backs away slowly, staring at me like I’m someone he’s never seen before. Then he turns and walks out of the house without another word. The door closes behind him.

I pick up our daughter and hold her against my chest until she stops crying. Blake doesn’t come back that night or the next night. I get a single text on Saturday morning saying he needs space to process what I did to his career. I don’t respond.