My Husband Cheated 3 Weeks Postpartum Because Witnessing Birth “Traumatized” Him. He Sells Surgical Equipment For A Living. How Should I Handle His Big Presentation Tomorrow

Rebuilding

Six weeks after the presentation Jenny texts me. She heard through work channels that Megan broke up with Blake. Apparently Megan realized Blake wasn’t the successful catch she thought she was getting involved with. Jenny says the gossip around the office is that Megan has no interest in playing stepmom to an infant while Blake pays significant child support every month. Blake is back to living alone in the apartment he rented after I filed for divorce.

I feel a strange mix of satisfaction and emptiness when I read Jenny’s message. Megan enabled Blake’s cruelty toward me. She sat in my house and talked about his trauma while knowing he was cheating. Part of me is glad she’s learning what kind of person Blake really is. But another part of me realizes that Blake losing Megan doesn’t give me back the four months of my daughter’s life that he missed. It doesn’t erase the cruel things he said about my body. It just means he’s alone now dealing with consequences.

Blake shows up for his first supervised visitation on a Saturday morning. The supervisor is a woman named Linda who works for the family services agency. She’s in her 50s with kind eyes and a no-nonsense attitude. Blake arrives looking exhausted and defeated. He’s lost weight and his clothes don’t fit right.

Linda explains the rules: Blake can hold the baby, feed her, play with her. Linda will observe and take notes. If Blake needs help with any care tasks, Linda will provide instruction.

I hand our daughter to Blake. He takes her carefully like she might break. She doesn’t cry, which surprises both of us. Blake sits on the couch with her in his arms and just looks at her face. He tells her he’s sorry for missing so much time. Linda watches quietly. I leave them there and go wait in my car.

Two hours later Linda calls to say the visit is over. I come back inside. Linda pulls me aside while Blake is putting his jacket on. She says he was awkward at first but he did try. He needed instruction on how to support the baby’s head properly and how to burp her after the bottle, but he listened to the instructions and followed them. Linda says Blake asked good questions about the baby’s routine and seemed genuinely interested in learning. She’ll include in her report that Blake needs more education on basic infant care but appears willing to put in the effort.

Blake leaves without talking to me. Linda schedules the next visit for Wednesday evening. I take my daughter home and feed her lunch. She babbles happily unaware that her father is finally trying to be present in her life.

I start therapy with Savannah the following week. Her office is in a small building near downtown. She’s younger than I expected, maybe late 30s with dark hair and an easy smile. I sit on her couch and don’t know where to start. Savannah asks me what brought me to therapy. I tell her everything: Blake’s affair, his cruel comments about my body, the revenge I planned, the satisfaction of watching him fail publicly, the divorce and custody battle.

Savannah listens without interrupting. When I finish, she’s quiet for a moment. Then she tells me that my anger was completely justified. Blake betrayed me during one of the most difficult times in my life. He was cruel when I needed support. Anyone would be angry.

“But you need to work through the betrayal and rebuild your sense of self beyond being Blake’s wronged wife,” she says.

The revenge felt good in the moment but it can’t be my whole identity going forward. I ask her what she means. Savannah explains that I’ve spent months focused on Blake, planning his downfall, documenting his failures as a father, fighting for custody and child support. All of that was necessary but now I need to figure out who I am as a single mother and as an individual person. What do I want for myself beyond making sure Blake faces consequences? What kind of life do I want to build for me and my daughter?

I don’t have good answers. “That’s okay. That’s what therapy is for. We’ll work on it together,” Savannah says.

She gives me some exercises to do at home—writing about what I enjoyed before I met Blake, thinking about what makes me feel strong and capable beyond the revenge I executed. We schedule another appointment for next week.

Jenny and I start meeting for coffee regularly. She shares her own story over lattes at a cafe near her house. Her birth experience was traumatic too. Emergency cesarean after 30 hours of labor, complications that left her in the hospital for a week. But her husband stayed with her the whole time. He learned to change diapers and give bottles. He told her she was beautiful even when she was exhausted and in pain. Jenny tears up a little when she talks about it. She says having a friend who understands both the betrayal and the medical sales world helps her process what happened to me.

I tell Jenny about Blake’s supervised visits and how he’s actually trying now. She says people sometimes grow up when they face real consequences. Maybe Blake is finally understanding what he lost. Or maybe he’s just trying to look good for the custody evaluation. Either way, our daughter deserves a father who shows up.

Jenny agrees. She says her kids are teenagers now and she still remembers how hard those early months were. Having support makes all the difference. We talk about other things too—Jenny’s book club, my plans to maybe go back to school, the upcoming holidays and how to navigate them as newly single parents. By the time we finish our coffee, I feel less alone than I have in months. Jenny hugs me before we leave and tells me to text her anytime.