My Husband Told Me His Mistress Is More Important Than Our Children. He Didn’t Know I Was Recording The Whole Conversation. How Do I Make Sure He Never Sees Them Again?

When Jake tried to tell him about making the select soccer team, Lance interrupted to complain about the divorce and blamed me for everything. He told the kids I was being unreasonable and keeping them from him on purpose.

He said Gloria missed them and couldn’t wait to see them again. The kids asked to leave after 30 minutes of the scheduled two hours.

The supervisor noted that Lance showed no awareness of his children’s emotional needs and seemed more focused on his own grievances.

Monday morning, Jillian calls after receiving the supervisor’s report. She’s using it to argue for reduced visitation frequency until Lance can demonstrate appropriate parenting behavior.

She filed a motion this morning requesting that visits be reduced to once monthly instead of twice monthly until Lance completes parenting classes and shows improvement. Lance’s attorney pushed back but weakly, clearly aware that their client is sabotaging his own case with his behavior.

Jillian sounds confident that the judge will agree with our position given the documented pattern of Lance’s poor parenting and self-centered focus. Tuesday afternoon, Gwyneth calls me sounding excited.

She heard through mutual friends that Lance’s relationship with Gloria is already showing strain. Apparently, Gloria is upset that he has kids and custody issues cramping their lifestyle.

She’s been complaining to her friends that she didn’t sign up for this drama and Lance comes with too much baggage. The friend says Gloria seems ready to move on to someone less complicated, someone without children and an ex-wife.

Gwyneth thinks Gloria might leave Lance soon, which would be poetic justice after everything he sacrificed for her. I try not to feel satisfied about this, but I can’t help it.

Two months pass with the kids settling into our new routine and Lance having minimal supervised visits that continue to go poorly. Finally, the mediation session arrives.

I meet Jillian at her office and we drive to the mediator’s building together. Lance arrives 20 minutes late, which the mediator notes with obvious disapproval.

He keeps checking his phone throughout the meeting, typing messages and barely paying attention. The mediator asks him to put the phone away and he does but keeps glancing at it.

We sit across from each other with our attorneys on either side and the mediator at the head of the table. The mediator reviews the custody proposal and asks if we’re ready to discuss arrangements.

Lance immediately jumps in, saying he wants more time with his kids. Jillian pulls out the folder I recognize from our preparation meetings and starts laying documents on the table.

She doesn’t rush, just places each piece of evidence carefully where the mediator can see it. The supervisor’s reports from the visitation center go down first, then Curtis’s psychological assessments of both kids, then the soccer coach’s statement.

She adds the principal’s documentation about Gloria’s inappropriate behavior at the school and Lance’s absence from parent teacher conferences and school events. Finally, she puts down my detailed records with dates and times and exact quotes, including the recording where Lance said Gloria was more important than our children.

The mediator picks up each document and reads while Lance shifts in his chair and checks his phone again. His attorney leans over to look at the evidence and I watch his expression change from confident to concerned.

Jillian sits back down next to me and folds her hands on the table, not saying anything yet because the documents speak for themselves. Lance finally looks up from his phone and notices everyone staring at the papers spread across the table.

He asks what all this is and Jillian tells him it’s the evidence of his behavior as a father over the past six months. The mediator finishes reading the last page and sets it down carefully, then looks directly at Lance.

She asks Lance if he’d like to respond to any of the documented incidents before they continue. He opens his mouth but nothing comes out at first.

Then he says the documents make things sound worse than they are. The mediator asks him to explain how telling his children that his mistress is more important than them could sound better in context.