My Husband Told Me His “Work Wife” Was An Upgrade. Then I Found Out He Was Paying Her Rent While Telling Me To Budget. How Should I Handle This Dinner Invite?

The Email from Craig

The person who called me too serious and said Jessica understood him better wasn’t someone I could trust with my heart even if I missed parts of our life together.

Two days after that therapy session Craig sent me a long email with the subject line “Please read.” I opened it during my planning period at the school and read through his apology and request for another chance. He promised he’d cut off all contact with Jessica and would do whatever it took to rebuild my trust.

I read the email three times looking for genuine understanding of what he’d done wrong. All I found were excuses about work stress and how Jessica made him feel appreciated when he was having a hard time. He promised to do better and go to marriage counseling but never acknowledged the fundamental disrespect he showed me for months. The email focused on his feelings and his struggles without really addressing how his actions affected me.

I saved the email to my drafts folder and spent the rest of the day thinking about how to respond. That evening I wrote back a shorter email explaining that this wasn’t about Jessica specifically, even though she was part of it. The real issue was how he talked about me to her, dismissed my feelings when I raised concerns, and built an emotional closeness with someone else while calling me insecure for noticing.

I told him I needed a partner who respected me even when I wasn’t in the room and he’d proven over months that he wasn’t that person. His drunken confession at Christmas just made obvious what had been true for a while. I hit send before I could second guess myself and then turned off my phone for the night.

Dinner with the In-Laws

6 weeks after the confrontation dinner Craig’s parents called asking me to meet them for dinner to talk things through as a family. I almost said no but decided one final conversation might provide closure. I told them I’d meet them at a restaurant downtown and asked if I could bring Laya for support. Craig’s mother sounded annoyed about that but agreed.

The night of the dinner I dressed carefully in nice jeans and a sweater, wanting to look put together and confident. Laya drove us to the restaurant and squeezed my hand before we walked inside. Craig’s parents were already seated at a corner booth looking serious and uncomfortable. His father stood to hug me but his mother just nodded stiffly.

We ordered drinks and appetizers while making awkward small talk about the weather and my teaching job. Then Craig’s father cleared his throat and said he wanted to understand my perspective on everything that happened. He suggested marriage counseling and a fresh start, saying “Every marriage goes through rough patches.”

I appreciated that he was trying to be fair but his mother couldn’t help making pointed comments about me being unforgiving and throwing away 8 years over a misunderstanding. I set down my water glass and looked directly at Craig’s mother. Her lips were pressed together in that way she had when she disapproved of something but didn’t want to say it outright.

I took a breath and started listing everything Craig had said about me that night after the Christmas party. How I was too serious and didn’t laugh at his jokes. How I didn’t understand his real personality because I wasn’t part of his work life. How Jessica was better suited to his needs because she brought him coffee and remembered his presentations. How he’d married the wrong type of woman.