My Wife Laughed At A Love Letter I Received And Called Her Family To Join In. She Called Me “Damaged Goods” To Her Sisters. Now She Is Begging For Spousal Support While My Lawyer Destroys Her In Court.

Tactics and Lies

When we left the coffee shop, the sun was setting and the street lights were coming on. 3 days later, Jeremy called to tell me Lisa had hired an attorney. Her name was Delilah Caruso and she had a reputation for nasty tactics in divorce cases.

Jeremy sent me copies of the motions Delilah had filed that morning. The papers claimed I abandoned the marriage without cause, that I was having an affair with a coworker, and that I owed Lisa all her legal fees plus temporary spousal support while the divorce was pending. The motion demanded $3,000 a month in support based on Lisa’s claim that she’d become accustomed to a certain lifestyle during our marriage.

I read through the papers twice, feeling my stomach turn. Everything in the filing was twisted to make me look like the villain. It said I left without warning, that I refused to communicate or work on the marriage, that I was cruel and vindictive. There was no mention of 15 years of mockery or emotional abuse.

Jeremy scheduled a call for that evening to go over our response strategy. When I talked to Jeremy that night, he sounded completely calm. He explained that Lisa’s claims were baseless since I left due to her abuse and we had no children or significant shared assets.

The house was in both our names but we only had about 30,000 in equity after 15 years because Lisa spent money as fast as I earned it. She bought clothes she never wore, kitchen gadgets she never used, and insisted on eating out four times a week at restaurants we couldn’t really afford.

Jeremy said Delilah was trying to intimidate me into a bad settlement by filing aggressive motions right away. He’d seen this tactic before and it rarely worked once we got in front of a judge with actual evidence. He asked if I was okay and I told him I was tired but holding up.

The following week, I had my first appointment with Mia, the therapist who specialized in emotional abuse recovery. Her office was in a converted house with a waiting room that had soft lighting and comfortable chairs. She came out to get me at exactly 3:00 and led me back to her office.

I started explaining about the divorce. The words came out slowly at first and then faster as I described 15 years of constant mockery and belittling. I told her about Lisa’s family laughing at me on video calls, about being called wallpaper and background noise, about being told no one would ever want me.

And saying it all out loud made it real in a way I’d been avoiding. My voice cracked when I got to the part about Caroline’s letter and Lisa’s response. Mia listened without interrupting and when I finished she said she was glad I came in because what I described was serious emotional abuse.

At my second session with Mia the next week, she helped me understand that Lisa’s behavior fit clear patterns of emotional abuse and something called gaslighting. She explained that abusers often make their targets doubt their own perception of reality by denying things happened or claiming the target is too sensitive.

Lisa’s family enabling her mockery created a system where I was always the target and never allowed to be right. If I objected to being insulted, they’d say I couldn’t take a joke. If I got upset, they’d say I was being dramatic.

Mia said, “This kind of systematic undermining destroys a person’s sense of self-worth over time.”

She asked if I’d always been quiet and unsure of myself and I realized I hadn’t been before I met Lisa. In college, I’d been confident enough to ask Lisa out in the first place. Somewhere over 15 years, I’d become the person she said I was.

Family Interference

2 days after that session, my mom called to tell me that Lisa’s mother had contacted her. Lisa’s mom spent 20 minutes trying to convince my mom to talk me into dropping the divorce. She said Lisa was devastated and marriages required work and I was giving up too easily.

My mom, who never liked Lisa from the beginning, told her that Lisa treated me terribly for 15 years and she was glad I was finally standing up for myself. Lisa’s mom got angry and said my mom clearly didn’t know the whole story.

My mom responded that she knew exactly what she’d witnessed at family gatherings where Lisa mocked me in front of everyone. The call ended badly with Lisa’s mom hanging up. My mom called me immediately after to make sure I was okay and to tell me she supported my decision completely.

The restraining order hearing happened 2 weeks after I first filed. I got to the courthouse 30 minutes early and met Jeremy in the hallway outside the courtroom. He went over what would happen and reminded me to stay calm no matter what Lisa or her attorney said.

When we walked into the courtroom, Lisa was already there with her entire family sitting behind her. Her mother, Diana, and her other two sisters all turned to glare at me like I was the villain in this situation. Lisa was dressed in a conservative blue dress and had clearly been crying.

Delilah went first and argued that I was making too much out of normal marital disagreements. She said the hotel incident was just Lisa being upset about sudden abandonment and trying to talk to her husband. She claimed the voicemail messages showed a concerned wife trying to reach her spouse during a crisis.

Jeremy stood up when it was his turn and presented the video footage I’d recorded of Lisa banging on my hotel room door. The judge watched it with no expression while Lisa screamed on camera that I was having an affair and she was going to prove it.

Jeremy played three of the most unhinged voicemail messages where Lisa called me pathetic, worthless, and said, “No one would ever want me.”

The courtroom was completely silent except for Lisa’s voice coming from the speaker. The judge looked at Lisa for a long moment and then announced he was extending the restraining order for 6 months. He warned Lisa that any further violations would result in contempt charges and possible jail time.